The POWER of NEGATIVITY

And How to Overcome It!

Have you ever heard someone say, “think before you speak”? This is a common phrase a parent or grandparent would often tell a child or maybe even an elementary school teacher to a student. What we didn’t know then was just how POWERFUL verbalizing our thoughts can be. And even more importantly, how damaging it can be if the thoughts are negative.

As Darth Vader said it: “You don’t know the power of the dark side!”

It has been studied and proven that mindset has a significant separator impact in athletes which creates the gap between the best and the rest. Your mindset is a difference maker and can work for you or against you.

I recall hearing Lou Holtz learn the power of verbalizing thoughts early in his career when his team was down less than six points with just enough time left on the clock to win the game. They got the ball and he recalled the last thing he said to his quarterback as he headed towards the huddle “don’t throw an interception.” And his QB did exactly that and they lost the game. Coach Holtz realized the power of his words and how they worked against him vs. for him. He said he never again coached the same and always stated the positive outcome he was looking for.

In athletics and especially in business, the mind is the most powerful asset we have. It is the difference maker. And the power of negativity is HUGE. A recent study revealed some staggering statistics what happens to a person with a negative mindset:

·      Creativity decreases 18%

·      Errors increase 30%

·      Illness is either started or exacerbated 83%

·      Just three minutes of the News can increase negativity 27%

These are detrimental to yourself, others and your career!

Even more shocking is the effect of thought verbalization. It has been shown that a negative thought has a 4-7% impact on any given outcome and verbalizing those thoughts magnify the outcome 10%. Combined, a negative thought verbalized increases the probability 40-70%.

40-70%

Increase in Probability!

It can be as simple as saying:

“Nothing ever goes my way.”

“I’m having another one of those days.”

“When it rains, it pours.”

“I will never get through this.”

“Failure is in our family DNA.”

“ That’s just the way it is.” 

“And as fate would have it…”

It reminds me of the song lyrics of an old TV show called Hee Haw… “If it weren’t for bad luck I’d have no luck at all.. doom, despair, and agony on me.”

Here are a few interesting examples of just how powerful a negative mindset can be:

Boston Red Sox Bill Buckner’s Nightmare Comes True!

The “Curse of the Bambino” was a superstitious sports curse named for Babe Ruth after he was sold from the Boston Red Sox to the New York Yankees in 1919. Before Ruth’s departure, the Red Sox had been one of the most successful teams, winning five of the first 15 World Series titles. After the sale, the Red Sox went without a title for nearly a century while the previously lackluster Yankees became one of the most successful teams. The curse was a major negative thought well verbalized for many years and undoubtedly had a real effect on the team’s psyche! In game six in the 1986 world series, bottom of the 10th inning, the Boston Red Sox were one out from winning the world series and breaking the infamous curse. In a wild and incredible game that went into extra innings with the New York Mets, the very thing that Red Sox first baseman Bill Buckner stated just 12 days prior happened. In an interview, Buckner stated “the dreams are that you are going to have a great series and win, and the nightmares are that you are going to let the winning run score on a ground ball through your legs.”

And that is exactly what happened. The Mets’ were down 6-5, an erroneous pitch scored the tying run and then New York Mets’ Mookie Wilson hit a sure out game ending ground ball towards the first base line and as previously verbalized, went right through Buckner’s legs.

Nightmare!

Believing an erroneous SAT score changed everything!

A young man was struggling to succeed in high school and was near expulsion. He promised his mother he would take the SAT, a college entrance exam. At the time, the SAT had two sections, math and verbal accumulating to 800 points each. To his surprise, the results showed he obtained a 1480 out of 1600. He mother assumed he cheated, and the young man said he intended to, but the chairs were too far apart. At this point, he began to believe that he was actually smart and had a gift. He started attending class and changed who he was hanging around. His teachers noticed the difference. He was able to go onto a four year college and then to an Ivy League school and eventually becomes one of the most successful magazine entrepreneurs in the world.

12 years after receiving his SAT score, he received a letter. The SAT board periodically reviews their test taking procedures and policies. In their study, they found that he was one of 13 people sent the wrong SAT score. His actual score was 740/1600.

People say that the erroneous score changed his life, but it was his thoughts and actions that changed his life. People who score a 1480/1600 go to class.

A man’s thoughts froze him to death at 55 degrees

A young man who worked on a train crew was strong, healthy, and married with two children. He had many friends. His only fault was he was a constant pessimist. He worried about everything and usually feared the worst. One day, the young man was accidentally locked in a refrigerator boxcar at the end of the work shift and he began to panic.

After hours of banging and shouting, no one came. He began to scratch words into the wooden floor of the boxcar. He wrote, “It’s so cold, my body is getting numb. If I could just go to sleep. These may be my last words.”

The next morning the crew opened the heavy doors of the boxcar and found the young man dead. An autopsy revealed that every physical sign of his body indicated he had frozen to death. And yet the refrigeration unit of the car was inoperative, and the temperature inside indicated fifty-five degrees. The young man killed himself by the power of negative mindset.

So how do we combat this powerful effect? Here are a few thoughts to consider and actions to take:

1.     Life is not easy. Difficulties and challenges will come but you are NOT a victim. You have control over your thoughts.

2.     Challenge your thinking. Ask yourself if your thoughts are true and if they serve you well.

3.     Say nothing if a negative thought appears. Negative thoughts come to every person. DO NOT verbalize them. Be quiet.

4.     Find words of gratitude and get creative!

5.     Stop the intake of negative News, Social Media.

6.     What you seek, you will find. Look for ways to intake information that will inspire you and make you wise, insightful, helpful, and motivated.

7.     Stop handing around negative people.

8.     Find positive, purpose driven, encouraging people who see you better to spend time with. People who will challenge you and expect more. People that care about you enough to call you out when needed and help you improve.

9.     Be consistent in your path to optimism! Do the little things well every day and build your mental strength. “If you stay ready, you don’t have to get ready.” – Will Smith

10.  Understand that happiness is an emotional response to an outcome and is not sustainable. Rather, seek joy! Joy is a constant feeling you get when you are purposeful and doing what you are created to do.

Remember, thoughts become emotions which become actions which become results. You have control over what thoughts you keep and what thoughts you discard.

Never give up and Get Creative!